Monday, December 04, 2006
Monday, November 27, 2006
Friday, November 24, 2006
WIFE VS HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the wife replied, "In-laws."
WORDS
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men... The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"
CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time. "The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning. The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee." The husband said, "You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee." Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me." So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages that it indeed says.......... "HEBREWS"
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
WHAT KIND OF EMPLOYEE ARE YOU?
Aries Employee Profile (march 21 - april 19)
Aries employees make excellent troubleshooters.They'll usually want to be out in the field at a variety of different work sites fixing things. They certainly won't be happy for very long behind a desk in a 9 to 5 schedule. The bored Aries employee who has been forced into a square hole will typically be restless, angry, and careless with details. No amount of money would compensate for being stuck in a routine job. Money in fact isn't why they are working at all. They do want to be paid fairly and need a status position to satisfy their competitive tendencies--but even more importantly, they'll want challenging new projects They typically like to have a sense of responsibility and need to feel needed. In return, they'll give their all and provide detailed, consistent work. They will literally work themselves to exhaustion to prove themselves. If you want to keep your Aries co- worker productive and happy, you'll want to give them the opportunity to work independently or let them help and lead less experienced workers.
Taurus Employee Profile (april 20 - may 20)
Taureans make some of the best employees. They are loyal, hardworking, and no-nonsense. They work methodically and follow projects through until they are complete. Some may appear to work a little too slowly-usually because they are so careful-but they will always finish what they start. They thrive on structure, schedules, and routine. You'll find them doing the same exact thing at the same time every day. Taureans, however, are not exactly the malleable workers that they often appear to be. If they have to work in a chaotic environment, they won't be happy and will be prone to child-like temper tantrums and stubbornness. They might react similarly if they have to work around ignorant people or at a job where there is no obvious potential for advancement. Taureans will be very unhappy if there isn't a ladder for them to climb. Even in the worst situations, they will find a way to advance slowly, winning over the most difficult people who may stand in their way of progress. Taurus employees will only take so much patiently and happily before they feel they are being taken advantage of. They will gladly accept orders and do whatever dirty work needs to get done, but they expect rewards. They want material gain, salary increases, and the potential for more power. To make your Taurus employees happy, be sure to give them projects through which they will see tangible results-hopefully something that will allow them to express their unique creativity in addition to their practical side. They don't want to feel mired in details for long periods of time. Make sure to schedule regular performance and salary reviews.This show of respect should keep them loyal to the company.
Gemini Employee Profile (may 21 - june 21)
Gemini employees can have difficulty concentrating on one thing for long periods of time. They have quick-moving minds and love to talk and communicate their ideas with others. They thrive on social interaction -- even if their jobs don't particularly support it. You'll be able to find them wandering from desk to desk gossiping about all the sordid news in the office. They can be powerful persuaders in their speech and make ideal salespeople and mediators. They love to negotiate and can work out the best Deal for everyone involved. When properly stimulated, they can manage to keep their wandering mind focused and actually be quite productive. When they are bored, bogged down with mundane detail-work, or forced to work with people who they consider droll, they can become mean-spirited and gossipy. Their moods can fluctuate vastly day to day, as well as their productivity. It is really against their nature to be forced into an average workday schedule and environment. They are happier travelling. lf they are in an office they will need constant new stimulation. Most will be wanting advancement if they see this as a way to escape the limitations of their jobs. This can motivate them to put extra effort into their job. If you work with a Gemini, try to avoid getting into any debates with them they will surely win and it could end in some hard feelings on your part. They will need an accepting environment-one that supports their need for multi-tasking.
Cancer Employee Profile (june 22 - july 21)
The Cancer employee isn't at work to feed their ego -- their job is just a job and a means to get paid. They work steadily and are usually very reliable. You'll be able to depend on them to show up on time and do what is necessary. They won't get involved in power struggles or get upset when someone advances before them. They are able to accept the situation because they see it simply as a rung on the ladder up. Their motivation is security. They'll want more money the longer they've stayed at a job. They don't want to have to worry about how they'll make ends meet tomorrow so they'll need a stable position without much risk. Cancerian workers can slip into some dark moods on occasion. During these periods productivity tends to drop-as well as everyone else's in the office. Their moods can be so strong everyone becomes affected. To avoid the frequency of these occurrences, managers and co-workers should try to make the work environment as homey as possible-keep it well heated, cozy, and friendly.
Don't press them to reveal their true inner thoughts-their tendency is to be secretive and protective, and they could see prying as an attempt to disturb their security.
Leo Employee Profile (july 22 - august 21)
Leo workers want to be first and at the center of the office.Even if they can't lead, they'll look for every opportunity to increase their own status and if someone else seems ahead of them, look out. They will make it clear that they aren't happy by pouting and complaining. They want advancement so much that they'll take on more responsibility and carry a heavier load than anyone else does in the office. And they are self-promoters. It is likely that they are telling everyone in the office what a great job they are doing as well as giving everyone unwanted advice. They know they are superior and want everyone to know it as well. This arrogance can sometimes cause problems when working with management. But typically, they are just hard workers out to demonstrate just how good they really are. They thrive in sales positions - they can promote a product or company just as well as they promote themselves. Their strength and arrogance isn't just show either. In a crisis situation, Leos really demonstrate their true courage. Leos want to lead and will be pushing for more responsibility and rewards. They are happy to train and mentor new co- workers as they enjoy giving advice and being in positions of authority. If you are trying to manage a Leo employee, you'll need to give them plenty of praise, responsibility, and independence. They will certainly want to help lighten your load of management responsibilities. Just be careful- the next thing you know they could be taking over your job.
Virgo Employee Profile (august 22 - september 22)
In the right situations Virgos love to work. They make ideal employees, happily working late into the night to make sure everything is perfect and in order. If you are looking for an employee who doesn't mind starting from rock bottom in the most entry-level position at the company, hire a Virgo. They'll have no complaints about the position being beneath them. They are CONTENT with basic, honest hard work. Their contentment isn't always apparent, however.. They love to complain and worry. They are quick to criticize the way things are done around the office and are the first ones to grumble disapprovingly at what they consider to be extravagance or laziness. They are blunt and honest and don't mince words over what they feel just isn't right. Usually, this will be brought on by someone doing a half-baked job or not being considerate of other co-work ers. You'll want to constantly reassure them, but this will do little to quell their anxieties. They actually enjoy worrying, and there is little you can do about it. Just give them a detail - oriented project and let them work alone on it. You won't have to supervise a Virgo worker. They'll check all the facts before getting started and catch their own errors when they are done. To keep a Virgo employee happy, you should also make sure their environment is orderly and calm. You should also provide small gestures of appreciation. They don't need extravagance, just let them know you appreciate them in small ways that won't embarrass them. They will probably just shrug their shoulders and say, "It's no big deal." But deep down inside they need these little reassurances.
Libra Employee Profile (september 23 - october 22)
Libra employees are detailed, dedicated workers with sensitive natures. Managers and co-workers sometimes find them difficult to get a handle on. They pick up the energy of the office and are unable to prevent it from affecting them. Loud noise, flashy colors, and discordant vibrations will put them off so much that they will have difficulty fulfilling their obligations at work.
One day they may seem like the most bright, hardworking, ambitious employee around. The next day they might be down, irritated, and unable to produce. Co-workers shouldn't fret when Libra employees are in a dark mood. It really won't last, as a happy state of mind can come over them just as quickly. When Libra employees are in a balanced frame of mind, they can be a powerful presence at work-they have a way of gracing everything they touch. Underneath that mess of moods, they really are basically happy and stable people. They are capable of profound logical thought and evaluate all sides of a situation before acting. They are one of the most intelligent Signs around. They are expert researchers and mediators. And their sensitivity to their environment makes them naturals at keeping things looking great. They will easily help others resolve conflicts and can act as a go-between with workers and management so that everyone ends up happy. If you want to keep your Libran worker smiling, give them the respect they are due and put them in a position where they can project their great charm and diplomacy. They won't be CONTENT to take orders for very long, either- make sure they are given increased
responsibility.
Scorpio Employee Profile (october 23 - november 21)
Scorpio employees usually exude a quiet self-confidence. They are self-sufficient and do not depend on others for a sense of self-worth. They keep their private life separate from work and take complete responsibility for their actions and their situation. They don't make excuses; they just take care of business and expect everyone else to do the same. Those who don't, co- workers and managers- will have to endure the Scorpio wrath. They don't mind being completely vocal about what they feel is wrong with any given situation. And if you tread on their fire be sure to expect retaliation. They won't take insults or opposition lying down. If you manage a Scorpio employee, be sure to follow through with your word and don't break any promises-Scorpio is keeping track and building up some heavy resentments against you if you do. You may not even be aware of it until too late-but when Scorpio gets too m uch, you'll be sure to know. Scorpio employees will react towards those around them exactly as they are treated. When they get what they want, they will be very accepting. If you are trying to work with or motivate a Scorpio co-worker, be sure to treat them respectfully and act professionally. Give them challenging work that allows them to utilize their awesome self-confidence and courage.
Sagittarius Employee Profile (november 22 - december 21)
The Sagittarian employee is head strong, cheerful, and willing to help. They exude self-confidence and take on tasks like there's no tomorrow. They are willing to tackle even the toughest of projects as long as it is challenging and gets them out of the routine. Lucky for them, their shining personalities and honest enthusiasm seem like a bright spot in the office- otherwise co-workers might begin to build animosity towards someone so arrogant and extravagant. Their tendency to exaggerate and take on more then they can handle usually results in missed deadlines and dropping the ball-not because they are lazy of procrastinate, but because their enthusiasm just gets the better of them sometimes. Don't let their nonchalance fool you-they really do care about what they are doing. They just have an easy-going attitude that allows them to keep on smiling even when they just messed up big time. Just because they are flexible and easy-going doesn't mean they won't tell you exactly how they feel-what is working for them and what isn't. And they won't just blindly take orders - they need to understand the method and reason behind the process. If you are trying to motivate your Sagittarian employee, be sure to feed them plenty of challenging new projects and hint that some business trips might be on the horizon once deadlines are met. And whatever you do, try not to question their intentions - it is the quickest way to make them upset. They aren't capable of deceit.
Capricorn Employee Profile (december 22 - january 20)
A Capricorn employee with too much to do is a happy worker. They need plenty of projects and responsibility. There is no sadder sight than a Capricorn worker without a sense of responsibility. They need to be needed. They are covertly ambitious - usually not flashy or obvious about it-but you will usually know that they are serious and determined about advancing themselves. They are completely scrupulous, so much so that they can be self-disparaging. But they are no pushovers. They can wear down even the toughest customers. Their persistence is incredible. Once they set their sights on a goal, they work away at it until the bitter end-whether the goal be that hard sell or the new hardware release. Capricorns don't work for free, however. They expect to be paid handsomely and be given more and more responsibility. They need to come out ahead of the pack in the end, and they see the work environment as their primary vehicle. They won't go in for the typical office gossip and politics, though. They want to get down to business at work and see it as no place for fooling around. With a strong sense of duty and respect towards their superiors, it is rare they will join in on boss-bashing or knocking the system. They can get frustrated, however, with blue sky management schemes that lack common sense, and they will interject their dry sense of humor in the most critical ways. If they want change, they will be unyielding. If all their effort leads to naught the result will be deep moods of darkness and depression with a sense of hopelessness. Keep your Capricorn employee happy by paying them fairly and giving them plenty of hard work. Arrange for a path of advancement within your organization for them. If you don't, you might find them looking for other opportunities.
Aquarius Employee Profile (january 21 - february 19)
The Aquarius employee can't tolerate unfairness in the office. Hair brained schemes will get the positive attention they deserve if an Aquarian has anything to do with it. They'll try to help everyone see the good side of a bad situation if it's the last thing that they do. They are so smart-they can't help but hold management in disdain if they feel that they are being unfair and unintelligent. It isn't that they are overly ambitious and think they could be doing a better job- just that they think people in power should know better. Most Aquarius workers are still looking for themselves and will want to try their hand at a variety of jobs in the workplace.
Whatever they are doing, they will do conscientiously. They usually have strict personal codes that include a strong work ethic.Their bright, off-beat intelligence, and trustwothiness will typically gain them many friends-in and out of work. Beneath that sometimes odd-ball behavior is solid, concrete thinking and sensitivity to co-workers. Keep your smart Aquarius co-worker happy by giving them plenty of opportunity to learn news kills. Raises are less important to them. No amount of money will make it worth their while to stay in a stagnant position. Don't let them get too bored or they will simply find another job as easily as they found this one-their genius is easy to spot.
Pisces Employee Profile (february 20 - march 20)
The Pisces employee can be a loyal and hard-working, if unconventional, worker. In the right position, they are able to keep their daydreams in check and buckle down on the detail work-giving their all to the boss and corporation whom they feel are worthy of devotion. On the flip side, there is no image of extreme misery like that of an ill-placed Pisces worker. They will act as though their cubicle were a prison cell as they daydream of their own business or next vacation. Unhappy Pisces workers usually won't stick around too long. Often Pisceans will drift from one job to another looking for that ideal environment to which they will be able to commit and feel a sense of purpose. And if things are going in a bad direction at the office, Pisces will be the first to sense it.
They'd rather pick up and leave then wait until the problem reaches a head. Pisces are often misunderstood by their co-workers. Typically timid and introspective, they usually keep their true nature hidden, for fear it wouldn't fit with the corporate culture.
What motivates a Pisces employee to not only stick around but also excel? Try compliments. And show them how their work impacts the entire organization. They need to know that what they are doing is worth something on a grander scale. Acceptance of their unconventional organization and planning will be necessary. Just because their sales report isn't in the typical format doesn't mean it is any less effective. Keep their environment bright and upbeat; and an after-work cocktail wouldn't hurt.
Monday, November 13, 2006
How our experts are going to win Nobel Prize :~)
A man is driving down a country road when he spots a farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. Of course, the farmer is blond.
He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing and looking at nothing.
The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks, "Ah, excuse me, mister, but what are you doing?"
The farmer replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize."
"How?" asks the man, puzzled.
"Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize to people who are out standing in their field!"
Monday, November 06, 2006
True or False ...?
Can you guess which of the following are true or false:
1. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
2. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a bellybutton.
3. A pack-a-day smoker will lose approximately 2 teeth every 10 yrs.
4. People do not get sick from cold weather; it's from being indoors a lot more.
5. When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop even your heart!
6. Only seven (7) percent of the population are lefties.
7. 40 people are sent to the hospital for dog bites every minute.
8. Babies are born without knee caps. They don't appear until they are 2-6 years old.
9. The average person over fifty will have spent 5 years waiting in lines.
10. The toothbrush was invented in 1498.
11. The average housefly lives for one month.
12. 40,000 Americans are injured by toilets each year.
13. A coat hanger is 44 inches long when straightened.
14. The average computer user blinks 7 times a minute.
15. Your feet are bigger in the afternoon than the rest of the day.
16. Most of us have eaten a spider in our sleep.
17. The REAL reason ostriches stick their head in the sand is to search for water.
18. The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning it's head are the rabbit and the parrot.
19. John Travolta turned down the starring roles in "An Officer and a Gentleman" and "Tootsie".
20. Michael Jackson owns the rights to the South Carolina State anthem.
21. In most television commercials advertising milk, a mixture of white paint and a little thinner is used in place of the milk.
22. Prince Charles and Prince William NEVER travel on the same airplane just in case there is a crash.
23. The first Harley Davidson motorcycle built in 1903 used a tomato can for a carburetor.
24. Most hospitals make money by selling the umbilical cords cut from women who give birth. They are reused in vein transplant surgery.
25. Humphrey Bogart was related to Princess Diana. They were 7th cousins.
26. If coloring weren't added to Coca-Cola, it would be green.
ANSWERS:
They're all true and now go to #16 ;)
Confidence Trust Hope
CONFIDENCE
Once all village people decided to pray for rain .On the day of prayer all, people gathered and only one boy came with an umbrella that's confidence...........
TRUST
Trust should be like the feeling of a one year old baby When you throw him in the air, he laughs...... Because he knows you will catch him........
HOPE
A human being can live for 40 days without water, 8 minutes without air, But not even 1 second without hope....
SO ALWAYS HAVE CONFIDENCE, TRUST OTHERS AND NEVER LOOSE HOPE
Thursday, November 02, 2006
Company Policy To all Employees
Effective From January 2007
Dress Code
1. It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we assume You are doing well financially and therefore do not need a pay raise.
2. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a pay raise.
3. If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and Therefore you do not need a pay raise.
Sick Days
We will no longer accept a doctor's certificate as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Holiday Days
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday & Sunday.
Compassionate Leave
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements.
In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral Should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.
Toilet Use
1.Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the cubicles.
2.At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the cubicle door will open, and your picture will be taken.
3. After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the company notice board under the "Chronic Offenders" category.
4. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sanctioned under the company's mental health policy.
Lunch Break
1. Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more so that they can look healthy.
2. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
3. Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. Remember we are an employer of choice and we are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations,accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.Cordially, Management Important : [This e-mail is confidential and may also be privileged. If you are not the intended recipient, please delete it and notify us immediately; you should not copy or use it for any purpose, nor disclose its contents to any other person. Thank you.]
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
It's a Dog's life After All
A butcher watching over his shop is really surprised when he sees a dog coming inside the shop. He shoos him away. But later, the dog is back again. So, he goes over to the dog and notices it has a note in its mouth. He takes the note and it reads "Can I have 12 sausages and a leg of lamb, please". The dog has money in its mouth, as well. The butcher looks inside and, lo and behold, there is a ten dollar note there. So he takes the money and puts the sausages and lamb in a bag, placing it in the dog's mouth.
The butcher is so impressed, and since it's about closing time, he decides to shut the shop and follow the dog. So off he goes. The dog is walking down the street, when it comes to a level crossing; the dog puts down the bag, jumps up and presses the button. Then it waits patiently, bag in mouth, for the lights to turn.They do, and it walks across the road, with the butcher following him all the way. The dog then comes to a bus stop, and starts looking at the timetable. The butcher is in awe as the dog stops a bus by pulling its left leg up and gets in it. The butcher follows the dog into the bus. Then the dog shows a ticket which is tied to its belt to the bus conductor.
The butcher is nearly fainting at this sight, so are the other passengers in the bus. The dog then sits near the driver's seat looking outside waiting for the bus stop to come. As soon as the stop is in sight, the dog stands and wags its tail to inform the conductor. Then, without waiting for the bus to stop completely, it jumps out of the bus and runs to a house very close to the stop.
It opens the big iron gate and rushes inside towards the door. As it approaches the wooden door, the dog suddenly changes its mind and heads towards the garden. It goes to the window, and beats its head against it several times, walks back, jumps off, and waits at the door. The butcher watches as a big guy opens the door, and starts abusing the dog, kicking him and punching him, and swearing at him. The butcher surprised with this, runs up, and stops the guy.
"What in heaven's name are you doing? The dog is a genius. He could be on TV, for the life of me!", .............to which the guy responds: "You call this clever? This is the second time this week that this stupid dog's forgotten his key."
Moral of the story:
"You may continue to exceed onlooker's expectations but shall always fall short of the boss' expectations."
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Heritage in Ruins - Sad but True.
Vintage colonial british buildings in Sadder Karachi.I want to shoot all these cool buldings ASAP, before they are demolished.
By Photographer
Angels Decending
Its time to switch on the lights, after sunset the reflection of sunlight on the clouds.
By Photographer
WINNER v/s LOSER
Winners have dreams;
Losers have schemes.
Winners see the grains;
Losers see the pain.
Winners see the potential;
Losers see the past.
Winners make it happen;
Losers let it happen.
Winners see possibilities;
Losers see problems.
Winners makes commitments;
Losers makes promises.
Winners are a part of the team;
Losers are apart from the team.
Winner always has a programme;
Loser always has an excuse.
Winner says "Let me do it for you";
Loser says "That is not my job".
Winners say "I must do something";
Losers say "Something must be done".
Winner is always a part of the answer;
Loser is always a part of the problem.
Winner sees an answer for every problem;
Loser sees a problem for every answer.
Winners believe in win/win;
Loser believe for them to win, someone has to lose.
Winner says "It may be difficult but it is possible";
Loser says "It may be possible but it is too difficult".
Winner makes a mistake. he says "I was wrong";
Loser makes a mistake, he says "It wasn't my fault".
Monday, October 30, 2006
WIFE 1.0 - Tech Support
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 . I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3 , Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6 no longer run , crashing the system whenever selected. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!Thanks, A Troubled User. REPLY:
Dear Troubled User: This is a very common problem that men complain about. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 , thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony - Child support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation. The best course of action is to enter the command C:\ APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 .However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 ! WARNING!!! DO NOT , under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system. Best of luck, Tech Support
Economics
TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS
You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You retire on the income.
IBM ECONOMICS
You have 2 cows You put both of them on the bench And hire another to do the job.
BEARING POINT ECONOMICS
You have 2 cows You train them for two months on how to milk themselves. Then u ask them to pull bullock carts.
AMERICAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You profess surprise when the cow drops dead.
FRENCH ECONOMICS
You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
GERMAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows. You reengineer them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.
BRITISH ECONOMICS
You have two cows. They are both mad cows.
ITALIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows. You don't know where they are. You break for lunch.
SWISS ECONOMICS
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
JAPANESE ECONOMICS
You have two cows. You redesign them so that they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cute cartoon cow images called Cowkimon and market them worldwide.
RUSSIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 17 cows. You give up counting and open another bottle of vodka.
CHINESE ECONOMICS
You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers.
INDIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.You worship them.
PAKISTAN ECONOMICS
You dont have any cows. You claim that the Indian cows belong to you. You ask the US for financial aid, China for military aid, British for Warplanes, Italy for machines, Germany for technology, French for submarines, Switzerland for loans,Russia for drugs and Japan for equipment.You buy the cows with all this and claim of exploitation by the world.
Friday, October 27, 2006
Khota and Zebra
A Donkey kicked sardar jee and ran away...sardar jee ran to catch the donkey.. he saw a zebra and started beating him and said,
"KHOTEYA TRACK SUIT PA K MEINOO TOKHA DEY REYA AEY".
Saturday, October 21, 2006
Learn 'C' after marriage
struct female_professional s
{
double styles;
long time_to_understand_ problems;
float mind;
void knowledge;
char non_co-operative;
}
struct married_females
{
double weight;
short tempered;
long gossip;
float hopes;
void word;
char unstable;
}
struct engaged_females
{
double time_on_phone;
short attention_on_ work;
long boast;
float on_cloud_nine;
void understanding;
char edgy;
}
struct newly_married_ females
{
double dinner_invitation;
short time_at_work;
long lunch_break;
void bank_balance;
char hen_pecked;
}
struct husband_wife_ professionals
{
double income;
short tempered;
long time_no_see_ each_other;
void love_life;
char money-making;
}
What about your life ... ^_^
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Medical Benefits of Taraweeh Prayers
By: Dr. Ibrahim B. Syed
Muslims derive therapeutic and spiritual benefits starting from the Wudu to the physical movements in the Salat-Takbir, Qiyam, Ruku, Sajda, Jalsa, and Tasleem. We perform five daily contact prayers (Salat) and voluntary prayers (Sunnah, Nafl) throughout the year and Taraweeh prayers during the month of Ramadan. This results in moderate physical exercise particularly to every muscle in the body. Some muscles contract isometrically (same length) and some contract in approximation or isotonically (same tension). The energy needed for the muscle metabolism increases during the performance of Salat, resulting in a relative deficiency of oxygen and muscle nutrients. In turn this deficiency causes vasodilatation - an increase in the caliber of blood vessels, thereby allowing blood to flow easily back to the heart. The temporarily increased load on the heart acts to strengthen the heart muscle and to improve the circulation within the heart muscle.
During the month of Ramadan, additional prayers are performed after salatul Ishaa, called Taraweeh prayers which vary from eight rakat to 22 rakat. There's a few minutes break after every four rakat for chanting and extolling the Majesty of Allah. After Iftar the blood glucose level continues to rise from the food ingested. Just before the Iftar meals, the blood glucose and insulin levels are at their lowest level. After an hour or so after the Iftar meal, the blood glucose begins to rise and also plasma insulin. The liver and the muscles take up the circulating glucose. The blood sugar reaches high levels in an hour or two and the benefits of Taraweeh prayers come into effect. The circulating glucose is metabolized into carbon dioxide and water during the Taraweeh prayers.
Hence, the Taraweeh prayers help in expanding the extra calories and improve flexibility, coordination, reduce stress-related autonomic responses in healthy persons, and relieve anxiety and depression.
Physical and Emotional Well-being
The gentle exercises performed in Taraweeh prayers improve physical fitness, emotional well-being and increase the longevity of the Namazi (one who performs the Salat or Namaz). When a little extra effort is made, as in performing the Taraweeh prayers, there will be a betterment in the endurance, stamina, flexibility and strength. It was noted that the five daily prayers (salat) produce the same physiological changes without any undesirable side effects as those produced by jogging or walking at about three miles per hour. Recent research studies performed on 17,000 Harvard alumni who entered college between 1916-1950 gives strong evidence that only moderate aerobic exercise, equivalent to jogging about three miles a day, promotes good health and may actually add years to life. Men who expended about 2000 kcal of exercise on a weekly basis (equal to a daily 30 minute walk, run, cycle, swim, etc.,) had one-quarter to one-third lower death rates than classmates who did little or no exercise. In addition to the health-boosting qualities of the salat (Namaz), the Namazi will be trained to be ever-ready for any unexpected physical exertion such as sudden lifting of children, chairs, or catching a public transportation vehicle. The elderly will accomplish this more securely and efficiently. Hence, this is an advantage for the elderly to maintain their physical fitness for a longer period of time. It has been observed that those who fast and perform the Taraweeh prayers report feeling much convalescing and robust.
Elderly
As human beings grow older, their physiological activity diminishes. As a result, their bones become thinner, and if not taken care of, will suffer from osteoporosis. This condition causes the fractures of the bones in the elderly when they fall due to a loss of bone mineral content and consequent sponginess of the bones. The bone then becomes structurally unstable, brittle and susceptible to fractures. Primary osteoporosis is most common among postmenopausal (due to reduction in estrogen) women or those who have undergone a bilateral ocphorectomy (both the ovaries removed). Women are six times more likely than men to develop Type I osteoporosis. The three major prevention strategies of osteoporosis are a high dietary intake of calcium and vitamin D, regular exercise and estrogen replacement in postmenopausal women. The skin also becomes fragile and crinkled. The repair processes of the body become slower and immune responses are decreased. In the elderly, their physical activity is reduced. As a result, they have lower levels of Insulin Growth Factor 1. Reserve functions of all vital organs decrease and the elderly are more susceptible to mishaps and ailments. Because of repeated and regular movements of the body during salat, the muscle strength, tendon power, joint, flexibility and the cardiovascular reserve are improved. Hence, salat and Taraweeh prayers enable the elderly to enrich the quality of life and to meet with unforeseen difficulties such as falls which could injure their bodies. Therefore, Taraweeh prayers will improve their endurance, self-respect and self-confidence in being self-reliant.
Adrenaline is secreted even by minor activity. The secretion outlasts the incitement. Even after the Taraweeh prayers are over, the effects of adrenaline and noradrenaline are manifest. Adrenaline, also called epinephrine, is produced by the adrenal glands. The middle part of these glands, the adrenal medulla, secretes the hormone, which is chemically almost identical to the transmitter substance noradrenaline produced at the ends of sympathetic nerves. Adrenaline secretion into the bloodstream in stress causes acceleration of the heart, constriction of arterioles, and dialation of the pupils. In addition, adrenaline produces a marked increase in metabolic rate thus preparing the body for emergency. Even the thought or the intention of performing the Taraweeh prayers is sufficient to activate the sympathetic nervous system. Sympathetic nervous system (thoraco-lumber nervous system) is one of the two divisions of the autonomic nervous system, which supplies motor nerves to the smooth muscles of internal organs and to the heart muscle. Sympathetic nerve fibers arise via spinal nerves in the thoracic and lumbar regions. Their endings release mainly noradrenaline, which increases heart rate and breathing rate, raises blood pressure, and slows digestive processes, thereby preparing the body for "fight or flight" and antagonizing the effects of the parasympathetic nervous system. The adrenaline would re-distribute the blood in the body to the active muscles, mobilize liver glycogen if necessary in order to provide glucose for the active tissues, diminish fatigue in skeletal muscles, facilitate alveolar ventilation by relaxing bronchiolar muscle, and would initiate cardiovascular changes. Exercise induces a more effective functioning of beta-adrenoreceptors located on cell membranes.
Beneficial Effects of Gentle Exercise
The Taraweeh prayer is considered to be gentle exercise. The beneficial effects of gentle exercise on the body are many which are elaborated here.
Effects on Skeletal Muscle
Unused muscles atrophy inspite of the availability of ample proteins. During the Salat and Taraweeh prayers, every muscle in the body contracts, some isotonically and others isometrically. This gentle exercise also enhances endurance and diminishes tiredness. It helps the incapacitated to make the most of their remnant capabilities. The blood flow in a resting muscle is low. During the Salat and Taraweeh prayers, the blood flow is greatly increased to the muscles. Blood flow sometimes increases even before the start of Taraweeh prayers, with just the thought of performing the Taraweeh prayers. In addition to needing fats, proteins, and carbohydrates, the human body requires minerals such as Potassium for nerve and muscle activity. It is found in fruits, meats, seafood and milk. Potassium deficiency leads to muscular and neurologic disorders. Potassium is also important in the transmission of nerve impulses and is a major positive ion in intracellular fluids. Potassium is involved in cellular enzyme activities, and it helps regulate the chemical reactions by which carbohydrates are converted to energy and amino acids are converted to protein. Also, Potassium ions cause vasodilatation of arterioles. During the Taraweeh prayers, systolic Blood Pressure may rise (the larger number in B.P.) a little and the diastolic Blood Pressure (the lower number in B.P.) may remain unchanged or even fall. However, after the Taraweeh prayers are over, the B.P. may drop to just below normal levels which is a welcome sign. Taraweeh prayers improve respiratory efficiency; circulation in the capillaries surrounding the alveoli, or air sacs, is increased, bringing about enhanced gas exchange and deeper breathing. The increase in the maximal consumption of oxygen is what makes the Namazi feel better. Those who perform the Taraweeh prayers, apart from the prescribed salat prayers, are more alert and active than those who do not perform the Taraweeh prayers, even after the age of retirement. Taraweeh prayers improve physical strength and joint stability and reduce the risk of injury to the tendons and connective tissues. After age 40, the bone mineral density falls with age. Taraweeh prayers increase bone mineral density in both menopausal and in elderly women and prevents osteoporosis and maintains normalcy in bone structures. Osteoporosis results in hip fractures in women after menopause and in elderly men. The risk of osteoporosis is substantially reduced by regular Salat and Taraweeh prayers. Salat and Taraweeh prayers improve lubrication of joints, improve movement, and maintain flexibility. Deep vein thrombosis (the most common cause of ulceration of the legs in the elderly) is prevented by performing Salat and Taraweeh prayers.
Metabolic Effects
Salat and Taraweeh prayer improve body weight control and expand calories without proportionate increase in appetite. A combination of moderate dietary restriction, both at the Sahur and Iftar meals, accompanied by the Taraweeh prayers, should achieve weight reduction. This will also reduce both fat and body weight, but fat-free weight will remain constant or may even increase slightly. Hence, during Ramadan one should not over eat at the Sahur and Iftar meals and continue to perform Salat and Taraweeh prayers in order to lose some of the excess weight.
It is well known that exercise prevents coronary heart disease (CHD), increases high density lipo-proteins (HDL or healthy Cholesterol), increases maximum oxygen intake, slows the heart, lowers the B.P. slightly, decreases ventricular ectopic activity, enlarges the lumen of the coronary arteries and increases cardiac output. Exercise also improves carbohydrate tolerance and improves late-onset diabetes, and helps cases of chronic respiratory diseases. Beneficial changes have been recorded in the lipid profile, B.P. clotting factors, weight reduction and insulin sensitivity of muscles and other tissues in persons who exercise regularly. Growth Hormone secretion is elevated by fasting and it is further elevated by Taraweeh prayers. As Growth Hormone is necessary for collagen formation, this may be an important factor as to why the skin of those who fast regularly during Ramadan and perform the Taraweeh prayers do not get wrinkled, even when they grow old.
Mental Health
It is a known fact that exercise improves mood, thought and behavior. Exercise improves the quality of life, induces greater sense of well-being and energy, reduces anxiety and depression, influences mood favorably and contributes to self-esteem and an aura of confidence; improves memory in the elderly especially with constant repetition of the Ayaat (verses) from the Glorious Qur'an and other Ayaat which exalt His Glory. This constant repetition of the Qur'anic Ayaat would help to screen the mind from the incoming thoughts. It has been found by a Harvard University researcher. Dr. Herbert Benson, that repetition of a prayer, Ayaat of the Qur'an or remembrance (Dhikr) of Allah or muscular activity coupled with passive disregard of intensive thoughts cause a "relaxation response" that leads to the lowering of Blood Pressure and decreases in oxygen consumption and a reduction in heart and respiratory rates. All these are combined in the Taraweeh prayer which is an ideal condition for "relaxation response." It combines repeated muscular activity with repetition of salat, chanting of words of glorification of Allah and of supplications. The Taraweeh prayer puts the mind in a relaxed state. This calm state of the mind may be partly due to the release of encephalins, beta-endorphins (endogenous morphines) and others into the blood circulation. Endorphins are any one of the neuropeptides composed of many amino acids, elaborated by the pituitary gland and acting on the central and peripheral nervous systems to reduce pain. Endorphins are categorized as alpha-endorphin, beta-endorphin, and gamma-endorphin which produce pharamacologic effects similar to morphine. Beta-endorphin found in the brain and GI (gastro-intestinal) tract is the most potent of the endorphins and is a powerful analgesic (pain killer) in humans and animals. For example, during childbirth many women release endorphins reducing a woman's sensation of pain. The release of endorphins is associated with an euphoria. During childbirth, women who give birth with little or no medication sometimes label this euphoria a "birth climax."
Conclusion
Islam is the only religion in which physical movements of salat and Taraweeh prayers are combined with spiritual exercise. When salat and Taraweeh prayers are practiced throughout a person's life, recurring every few hours or so, it trains a person to undertake the difficult task of meditation during physical maneuvers of salat and Taraweeh prayers, so that the Namazi (one who performs the salat) benefits both from spiritual as well as physical exercise. Salat and Taraweeh prayers are unique in that tension builds up in the muscles during physical maneuvers on the one hand, while tension is relieved in the mind due to the spiritual ingredient, on the other hand.
The following benefits have been noted among those who perform the Taraweeh prayers: burning off calories and losing weight, maintaining muscle tone and body composition, joint flexibility (stiff joints are often the result of disuse, not arthritis), increasing metabolic rate, improving circulation, improving heart and lung function and aerobic capacity, decreasing heart disease risk profile, increasing your sense of self-control, reducing your level of stress, increasing your ability to concentrate, improving your appearance, reducing depression and resistance to depression, helping you sleep better and suppressing your appetite. Evidence is also accumulating that those who perform regular Salat along with voluntary prayers can conserve and actually retard the loss of bone mass in the elderly, thus starving off the ravages of osteoporosis that afflicts both men and women. It is also possible to retard the aging process and confer some protection to health in later life.
Those who have performed Salat (Fard and Wajib). Sunnah and Nafl and Taraweeh prayers throughout life get protection and a positive effect in terms of health and longevity. They reverse the life-shortening effects of cigarette smoking and excess body weight. Even people with high blood pressure (a primary heart disease risk) reduced their death rate by one-half and their risk of dying from any of the major diseases is reduced. They also counter genetic tendencies toward an early death. Hence Salat (Fard, Wajib), Sunnah, Nafl and Taraweeh prayers are necessary for Muslims to preserve life and their desirable qualities into old age.
Source: http://www.icna.org/tm All contents except those noted as copyright may be reprinted with appropriate acknowledgement. Each and every The Message article being reproduced at other WWW sites must have a link to this site.
Friday, October 13, 2006
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
~Chand Meri Zameen~
Chand Meri Zameen
Originally uploaded by Ejaz.
Somewhere around Paras Village in Northern Areas of Pakistan ...!
Monday, October 09, 2006
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Little girl in severe pain from fractures
Little girl in severe pain from fractures
Originally uploaded by Pakistan Earthquake.
Young girl with fracture in the arm and leg that was very painful. Leg required major debridement. She lost multiple members of her family.
Friday, October 06, 2006
A portrait void of sounds - EQ revisited
A portrait void of sounds
Originally uploaded by Ejaz.
I have been to various hospitals and wards and seen many patients but never have I found such silence and agony on the faces of these earthquake victims. Even we would sleep at 8-9'O clock with soft whispers or silent thoughts. A typical doctor's attendance in those days was around 400 which is mighty frustrating and mind-boggling in normal circumstances. And two weeks later when we returned, the only thought that kept our minds occupied was "was it all enough? Did we really do enough?" To this day, I couldn't find the answer. By the photographer
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Monday, October 02, 2006
Friday, September 29, 2006
Slow but Steady
Slow but Steady
Originally uploaded by tasveersaz.
Sometimes you're slow in what you do, but well, you're trying to grasp it really well. People don't understand that if you're slow in grasping something, you aren't really bad at it.
The reason you're slow is because you're trying to get steady, just like this turtle, firm in its position.
Not to forget, slow and steady wins the race.
---By the Photographer ...
Thursday, September 28, 2006
Women ...!
Hmmm ... it's bit anti-women but chalein khair hay koi nahi ....!
A woman parked her brand-new Lexus in front of her office ready to show it off to her colleagues. As she got out, a truck passed too close and completely tore off the door on the driver's side.
The woman immediately grabbed her cell phone, dialed 911,and within minutes a policeman pulled up. Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the woman started screaming hysterically. Her Lexus, which she had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it.
When the woman finally wound down from her ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief.
"I can't believe how materialistic you women are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."
"How can you say such a thing?" asked the woman.
The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."
"OH MY GOD!" screamed the woman. "Where's my new bracelet?????????????"
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Opening and Closing Prayers for Fast (Rauzaa)
I foundout that lot many people came to my blog searching for these dua's so I thought why not share them here ... In case .... :)
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Post of the MONTH
Just finished reading and forwarding off Teacher's Lesson By GH I guess it's the best post I've read this month ....! Follow the link to have your share in the journey to life ... Passion to Excel ...!
The Guys’ Rules
Bit outrageous :-) but Funny enough
Via Zag
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally , the guys’ side of the story.
We always hear “the rules” from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered “1″ ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days. 1. If you won’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, don’t expect us to act like soap opera guys. 1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. 1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” We will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine…Really. 1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf. 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape! 1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like camping. Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh. Pass this to as many women as you can to give them a bigger laugh.
Monday, September 25, 2006
Amazing Amazing Simply Amazing
DSC_0177_1
Originally uploaded by Mona-aaa.
I saw the image and I was like Oh My God ... what a beauty ... what a shot ... Subhan Allah!!!!
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Friday, September 22, 2006
What Everybody Has Done With Pakistan ...
Quaid-E-Azam:
Islamic Republic Of Pakistan
Ayub Khan:
Developed Republic Of Pakistan
Bhutto:
Peoples Republic Of Pakistan
Yahya Khan:
What So Ever Divided By 2 Pakistan
Zia-Ul-Haq:
Klash-Un-kove(AK-47) Republic Of Pakistan
Ghulam Ishaq Khan:
ISI Republic Of Pakistan
Moeen Qureshi:
Taxation Republic Of Pakistan
Benazir Bhutto:
Zardari Republic Of Pakistan
Nawaz Sharif:
Abba Jee & Sons Republic Of Pakistan
Gen. Pervez Musharraf:
Pakistan (Pvt). Ltd.
People Of Pakistan:
Immigration From Pakistan
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Joke of The DaY
"Punjab News" gets news that 100 sardars are killed in a train accident at Amritsar station. Only one sardar left alive.
The correspondent goes to him and asks, Sardarji how did it happen?
Sardar : oh ji pucho mat.. sab kuch sahi tha sab log platform par khade
gaadi ka wait kar rahe they. Achanak announcement hui ke shatabdee express 2 no. platform par aa rahi hai. Jaise hi sab ne suna ke gaddi PLATFORM PAR aa rahi hai, sab log apni jaan bachane ke liye patri par kood gaye. Aur tabhi gaddi patri par aa gayi.
correspondent : Thank god. Aap ne samajhdari dikhayee. Aap patri par nahin koode.
Sardar : oye nahin ji main to suicide karne ki liye patri par hi leta tha. Jaise hi announcement hui main to platform par char gaya
Does anybody know what time it is?
Does anybody know what time it is?
Originally uploaded by photoflusa.
It so lovely that I want to blog it twice :D
Facts about the # 11
1) New York City has 11 letters
2) Afghanistan has 11 letters.
3) Ramsin Yuseb (The terrorist who threatened to destroy the Twin Towers in 1993) has 11 letters.
4) George W Bush has 11 letters.
5) The two twin towers make an "11".
This could be a mere coincidence, but this gets more interesting:
6) New York is the 11th state.
7) The first plane crashing against the Twin Towers was flight number 11.
8) Flight 11 was carrying 92 passengers. 9 + 2 = 11
9) Flight 77 which also hit Twin Towers, was carrying 65 passengers. 6+5 = 11
10) The tragedy was on September 11, or 9/11 as it is now known. 9 + 1+ 1= 11
11) The date is equal to the US emergency services telephone number 911. 9 + 1 + 1 = 11.
Sheer coincidence? ! Read on and make up your own mind:
12) The total number of victims inside all the hi-jacked planes was 254. 2 + 5 + 4 = 11.
13) September 11 is day number 254 of the calendar year. Again, 2 +5 + 4 = 11.
14) The Madrid bombing took place on 3/11/2004. 3 + 1 + 1 + 2 + 4 =11.
15) The tragedy of Madrid happened 911 days after the Twin Towers incident.
Now this is where things get very eerie:
16) The most recognized symbol for the US, after the Stars & Stripes, is the Eagle.
The following verse is taken from the Quran, The Islamic holy book:
"For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome Eagle.
The wrath of the Eagle would be felt throughout the lands of Allah
and lo, while some of the people trembled in despair still more rejoiced for the
wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah and there was peace."
That verse is number 9.11 of the Quran.
Still unconvinced about all of this?! Try this and see how you feel afterwards. Open Microsoft Word and do the following (TRY THIS FOR REAL):
17) Type in capitals Q33 NY. This is the flight number of the first plane to hit one of the Twin Towers.
18) Highlight the Q33 NY
19) Change the font size to 48.
20) Change the actual font to the WINGDINGS 1 - SCARY, HUH??
via a forwarded mail
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Mistakes during Ramadaan
Too much stress on food and drink
For some people, the entire month of Ramadaan revolves around food. They spend the ENTIRE day planning, cooking, shopping and thinking about only food, instead of concentrating on Salaah, Qur'aan and other acts of worship. All they can think of is FOOD. So much so that they turn the month of 'fasting' into the month of 'feasting'.
Come Iftaar time, their table is a sight to see, with the multitudes and varieties of food, sweets and drinks. They are missing the very purpose of fasting, and thus, increase in their greed and desires instead of learning to control them. It is also a kind of waste & extravagance. "and eat and drink but waste not by extravagance, certainly He (Allaah) likes not Al-Musrifoon (those who waste by extravagance)" [al-A'raaf :31]
Spending all day cooking
Some of the sisters (either by their own choice or forced by their husbands) are cooking ALL day and ALL night, so that by the end of the day, they are too tired to even pray Ishaa, let alone pray Taraweeh, Tahajjud or read Quraan, etc.
Eating too much
Some people stuff themselves at Suhoor until they are ready to burst, because they think this is the way to not feel hungry during the day and some people eat at Iftaar, like there is no tomorrow, trying to 'make up for the food missed.' However, this is completely against the Sunnah. Moderation is the key to everything.
The Prophet (pbuh) said: "The son of Adam does not fill any vessel worse than his stomach; for the son of Adam a few mouthfuls are sufficient to keep his back straight. If you must fill it, then one-third for food, one-third for drink and one-third for air." (Tirmidhi, Ibn Maajah. Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani).
Too much food distracts a person from many deeds of obedience and worship, makes him lazy and also makes the heart heedless. It was said to Imam Ahmad: Does a man find any softness and humility in his heart when he is full? He said, I do not think so.
Sleeping all day
Some people spend their entire day (or a major part of it) 'sleeping away their fast'. Is this what is really required of us during this noble month? These people also are missing the purpose of fasting and are slaves to their desires of comfort and ease. They cannot 'bear' to be awake and face a little hunger or exert a little self-control.
For a fasting person to spend most of the day asleep is nothing but, negligence on his part.
Wasting time
Other people waste away their day playing video games, or worse still, watching TV, movies or even listening to music. Subhaan Allaah! Trying to obey Allaah by DISOBEYING him!
Fasting but not giving up evil
Some of us fast but do not give up lying, cursing, fighting, backbiting, etc. and some of us fast but do not give up cheating, stealing, dealing in haraam, buying lotto tickets, selling alcohol, fornication, etc. and we think we are sooooo good.
The Prophet (pbuh) said: "Whoever does not give up false speech and acting upon it, and ignorance, Allaah has no need of him giving up his food and drink." (Bukhaari)
Smoking
Smoking is forbidden in Islam whether during Ramadaan or outside of it, as it is one of al-Khabaa'ith (evil things).(This includes ALL eg. cigars, cigarettes, pipes,'Sheesha',etc.)
"he allows them as lawful At Tayyibaat (all good and lawful things), and prohibits them as unlawful Al Khabaa'ith (all evil and unlawful things) [al-A'raaf :157]
It is harmful, not only to the one smoking, but also to the ones around him. It is also a means of wasting ones wealth.
The Prophet (pbuh) said: "There should be no harming or reciprocating harm."
This is especially true during fasting and it invalidates the fast. (Fatwa -Ibn 'Uthaymeen)
Skipping Suhoor
The Prophet (pbuh) said: "Eat suhoor for in suhoor there is blessing."(Bukhaari, Muslim).
And he (pbuh) said: "The thing that differentiates between our fasting and the fasting of the People of the Book is eating suhoor." (Muslim)
Stopping Suhoor at 'Imsaak'
Some people stop eating Suhoor 10-15 minutes earlier than the time of Fajr to observe 'Imsaak'. Shaykh Ibn 'Uthaymeen said: This is a kind of bid'ah (innovation) which has no basis in the Sunnah. Rather the Sunnah is to do the opposite. Allaah allows us to eat until dawn:
"and eat and drink until the white thread (light) of dawn appears to you distinct from the black thread (darkness of night)" [al-Baqarah 2:187]
And the Prophet (pbuh) said: "….eat and drink until you hear the adhaan of Ibn Umm Maktoom, for he does not give the adhaan until dawn comes."
This 'imsaak' which some of the people do is an addition to that which Allaah has enjoined, so it is false. It is a kind of extremism in religion, and the Prophet (pbuh) said: "Those who go to extremes are doomed, those who go to extremes are doomed, those who go to extremes are doomed." (Muslim)
Not fasting if they missed Suhoor
Some people are too scared to fast if they miss Suhoor. However, this is a kind of cowardice and love of ease. What is the big deal if you missed a few morsels of food? It's not like you will die. Remember, obedience to Allaah overcomes everything.
Saying the intention to fast 'out loud' or saying a specific dua to start fasting
The intention is an action of the heart. The Muslim should resolve in his heart that he is going to fast tomorrow. It is not prescribed for him by the Shari'ah to say out loud, "I intend to fast", "I will fast tomorrow" or other phrases that have been innovated by some people. All he needs to do is to resolve in his heart that he is going to fast tomorrow.
Also, there is no specific dua to be recited at the time of starting the fast in the correct Sunnah. Whatever 'dua' you may see on some papers or Ramadaan calendars is a Bid'ah.
Delaying breaking fast
Some people wait until the adhaan finishes or even several minutes after that, just to be 'on the safe side'. However, the Sunnah is to hasten to break the fast, which means breaking fast right after the sun has set.
Aa'ishah said: This is what the Messenger of Allaah (pbuh) used to do. (Muslim)
The Prophet (pbuh) said: "The people will continue to do well so long as they hasten to break the fast." (Bukhaari, Muslim)
Determine to the best of your ability, the accuracy of your clock, calendar, etc. and then have tawakkul on Allaah and break your fast exactly on time.
Missing the golden chance of having your Dua accepted
The prayer of the fasting person is guaranteed to be accepted at the time of breaking fast.
The Prophet (pbuh) said: "Three prayers are not rejected: the prayer of a father, the prayer of a fasting person, and the prayer of a traveler." (al-Bayhaqi, saheeh by al-Albaani).
Instead of sitting down and making Dua at this precious time, some people forego this beautiful chance, and are too busy talking, setting the food, filling their plates and glasses, etc. Food is more important to them than the chance to have their sins forgiven or the fulfillment of their Duas.
Fasting but not praying
The fasting of one who does not pray WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED. This is because not praying constitutes kufr as the Prophet (pbuh) said: "Between a man and shirk and kufr there stands his giving up prayer." (Muslim)
In fact, NONE of his good deeds will be accepted; rather, they are all annulled.
"Whoever does not pray 'Asr, his good deeds will be annulled." (Bukhaari)
Fasting and not wearing Hijaab
Not wearing the Hijaab is a major sin as it is obligatory for Muslim women. (Surah Nur, Surah Ahzaab). So fasting and not wearing hijaab certainly takes away enormously from the rewards of fasting, even if does not invalidate it.
Not fasting because of exams or work
Exams or work is NOT one of the excuses allowed by the Shari'ah to not fast. You can do your studying and revision at night if it is too hard to do that during the day. Also remember that pleasing and obeying Allaah is much more important than 'good grades'.
Mixing fasting and dieting
DO NOT make the mistake of fasting with the intention to diet. That is one of the biggest mistakes some of us make (esp. sisters). Fasting is an act of worship and can only be for the sake of Allah alone. Mixing it with the intention of dieting is a form of Shirk.
Fighting over the number of Raka'ah of Taraweeh
There is no specific number of rak'ahs for Taraweeh prayer, rather it is permissible to do a little or a lot. Both 8 and 20 are okay.
Shaykh Ibn 'Uthaymeen said: "No one should be denounced for praying eleven or twenty-three (raka'ah), because the matter is broader in scope than that, praise be to Allaah."
Praying ONLY on the night of the 27th
Some people pray ONLY on the 27th to seek Lailat ul-Qadr, neglecting all other odd nights, although the Prophet (pbuh) said: "Seek Lailat ul-Qadr among the odd numbered nights of the last ten nights of Ramadaan." (Bukhaari, Muslim).
Wasting the last part of Ramadaan preparing for Eid
Some people waste the entire last 10 days of Ramadaan preparing for Eid, shopping and frequenting malls, etc. neglecting Ibadah and Lailatul Qadr. although, the Prophet (pbuh) used to strive the hardest during the last ten days of Ramadaan in worship (Ahmad, Muslim) and not in shopping.
Iftaar parties
Some people go to extremes with lavish 'Iftaar parties' with all sorts of disobedience to Allaah, from flirting, mixing of the sexes and hijaab-less women, to show-off and extravagance, to heedlessness to Salaah, and Taraweeh to even music and dancing
By Asma bint Shameem
I may not agree to every point here but it was an interesting read!
Monday, September 18, 2006
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Love, Wealth & Success
A woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said "I don't think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat."
"Is the man of the house home?", they asked.
"No", she said. "He's out."
"Then we cannot come in", they replied. In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.
"Go tell them I am home and invite them in!" The woman went out and invited the men in.
"We do not go into a House together," they replied.
"Why is that?" she wanted to know. One of the old men explained:
"His name is Wealth," he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one,
"He is Success, and I am Love."
Then he added, "Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home."
The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. "How nice!!", he said. "Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!"
His wife disagreed. "My dear, why don't we invite Success?"
Their daughter-in-law was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion:
"Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!"
"Let us heed our daughter-in-law's advice," the husband said to his wife.
"Go out and invite Love to be our guest."
The woman went out and asked the 3 old men, "Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest."
Love got up and started walking toward the house. The other 2 also got up and followed him. Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and Success:
"I only invited Love, Why are you coming in?"
The old men replied together: "If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would've stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!!!!!!" OUR WISH FOR YOU... Where there is pain, we wish you peace and mercy. Where there is self-doubting, we wish you a renewed confidence in Your Ability to work through them. Where there is tiredness, or exhaustion, we wish you understanding, patience, and renewed strength. Where there is fear, we wish you love, and courage.
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